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Parenting Victories

These days my parenting victories seem few and far between. I used to be an awesome mom with polite, obedient children. This didn’t happen by accident. Oh, no. It happened through hard work and consistent discipline. Consistency is the key, remember?!

These days? It feels like my parenting victories are few and far between. I have a kindergartener that doesn’t sleep though the night. I have kids who roll their eyes and think a few chores are torture and live in constant fear that they might do more work than…

…a sibling. <— this is apparently a fate worse than death.

Sometimes it feels like my parenting victories are few and far between...

But recently I’ve had a few victories. If, by victory, you mean I’m-still-alive-my-kids-are-still-alive-and-no-one-was-hurt. Let’s be honest, my idea of parenting victories have changed over a whole lot in the past few years. 

Recently I had an issue with a child at school…after having a very bad evening, wondering if progress with ever come, the child apologized appropriately and made things right. Even better? The issue was just as much the fault the other child, as my child. This inequity in the past would have met with, “why should I apologize? He needs to apologize to me!” And while all of that may be true, my child handled themselves with maturity and decorum.

Sometimes it feels like my parenting victories are few and far between...

Sure, ten years ago I could never have dreamed of being in this situation to start with…But my perspective has shifted and the victory is in my pride and joy at seeing this situation be resolved. 

But don’t be too discouraged! It isn’t all sunshine and roses, like I just described. I’ve decided recently (again) that I have no business volunteering for anything. Ever. 

Two weeks ago I got to go as a chaperone for Jubilee’s choir class. It was so much fun and I totally enjoyed being able to spend the time with her friends and teacher. It seemed, then, that it would be no problem to go as a chaperone for Tucker and Avi’s field trip this week.  

And it wasn’t.

Until my phone rang ten minutes into the performance (don’t worry, it was on vibrate).

And I had to answer because it was the school.

Calling to tell me Apollo was sick and I needed to pick him up.

Of course…because I had just ridden the school bus, half an hour away, to the theater.

And had no way to leave.

Thankfully Tilly was finished with her classes for the day and I was able to call her. She had to leave Walmart, drive home, pick up the van keys, drive to the school, get Apollo, leave the car and take the van (because it had Apollo’s car seat) then watch him until I returned. 

You win some and you lose some, am I right?

 

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10 Comments

  1. Jess Guest

    I was saying to Jon that when I had 5 under 6 and our days were filled with crafts, housework, ‘training for first time obedience’, singing songs, reading stories etc people always said “oh it gets easier as they get older, little ones are such hard work”

    Turns out people are liars, All little ones was a cake-walk!

    • Solemna

      Jess Guest that is my experience,too. I had 3 under 3 and it was so nice. Everybody asked my how I did it,all the diaper changes and the nursing/feeding and crying, but we had a really mellow time. We went for walks, the girls napped and now this summer all of them will be in school and it is so much more demanding…I liked it when they were sweet little babies…

    • bakersdozenandapolloxiv

      Oh my goodness, YES, Jess! I worked so hard for first time obedience, respect, bedtime, etc. And it WORKED. And I had some hard kids….but they I got kids who’s brains were wired differently and all of that “good parenting” went right out the window.

  2. Melpub

    yes. . . getting boys to take out the garbage is more work than doing it yourself. But the boys do take it out. After an hour of “I did it yesterday,” and “No, he didn’t, I did it yesterday.” And “Okay, Mom, in a minute,” followed by, “Can’t do it NOW, I’ll be late for school and that will be YOUR FAULT,” followed by “I hate you,” or “Ok, !@#$%^&*()_!!”

    • bakersdozenandapolloxiv

      Well, some of them are. I have a large pool of children to write about and they haven’t all been to your house 😉 On the other hand, accepting mistakes, taking personal responsibility for them and owning up are life lessons some people don’t ever learn…so I will take comfort in that.

  3. Melody

    Yep! That sounds about right ; )

    We’re in the middle of school hell right now with our 10 year old who is on the Autism Spectrum. He got suspended 2 days last week and the was sent home by 11:00 for behaviora issuesl every other day last week. When I went to pick him up yesterday he was laying in the middle of the reception area singing at the top of his lungs. When He was met with a small tinge of frustration on my part he began to loudly proclaim his desire to die (his default phrase to communicate how very overwhelmed he is). Just a tad humbling for this mama…to say the VERY LEAST!! I’m sure there were victories too, one being me running away for a day leaving dad to deal with all the chaos : ) Hang in there!!! You are certainly not alone!!!!

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