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The New Avi

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This is actually the old Avi. Sparkly eyes, beautiful teeth. Long hair.

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This is the new Avi. Sparkly eyes, beautiful teeth. Short hair.

Avi came up to me this morning asking if she could get her hair cut "like Jubilee's". I said I'd cut her hair as short as Jubilee, but no bangs. It simply doesn't work with her frizzy biracial hair. 

When I made the first snip, she said, "Mom, am I not ugly any more?".

I explained to her how she's never been ugly. I told her I met her when she was three days old and she was beautiful then like she is now.

Now my sweet girl is going around the living room talking about how ugly she is. She keeps asking when her hair will grow out and when she won't be ugly any more. She's asking me to sew it back on (she loves the cut, by the way…she just has some desperate, internal need for this type of attention). I knew there would be consequences whether I let her get her hair cut or not. So I cut it. A fresh start.

And darn it, she looks cute.

In other news, I dreamed last night that I was hanging out with Angelina Jolie. We went out for pizza and swapped mom stories. Only Angie wasn't eating her pizza. Even though I was going to have a piece.

What? You can can't picture me and Angie hanging out? Come one, we're both moms of large famlies. We've both adopted. We're both married to hotties. We've got a lot in common. Brad (we're on a first name basis) made waves in the photography community a few years ago when he took his twins newborn photos himself. So you see, we've got a lot of common ground. 

Chuck and Renee.

Brad and Angie.

It's all good.


  1. Bree

    My niece is biracial and looks a great deal like Avi. She recently turned five and her hair is a touchy subject. She does not like it long, she does not like it short. What she really wants is hair like her mother and older sisters, and the mostly Caucasian women and girls she is exposed to. Obviously, I don’t know Avi or the situation, but this might be a good time to broach the subject of individual differences? Maybe she’s beginning to recognize differences in her appearance from her non-adopted siblings?

  2. liz

    Avi looks adorable!
    Hope she feels better about “all of it” tomorrow. Funny you mention Brad and Angie..I was at work the other day and had pictures of my kids..Two are white as white bread, my baby is American but of Indian (Asia) ethnicity. The other RN herself was Philipino. She said “oh you and husband are like Brad and Angelina..” I cracked up as my DH name is Brad, but the only similarity is that we have one brown baby( and my kids are all adopted). If they were all Caucasian I don’t think she would have said that. LOL..And it’s not as if we are world travelers….my youngest was born about 40 min from
    I do LOVE Me some Brad and Angelina family photos…not paps of course..the nice photo shoot ones

  3. Elizabeth

    I’m still smiling and chuckling over that last part. Since I’ve never met you I could “picture” ya’ll hangin’ out easily. 🙂 Avi is beautiful and as you said, always was and I’m sure always will be. Must be more than heartbreaking to watch her never accept that. It’s not the same but I know how helpless I feel when one of my sisters never seems to truly like how she looks. Also is constantly hating her stomach, thinking it’s too big. (She’s thin and athletic) This is with no TV on in the house and movies really monitored. I guess all it takes is passing the magazine rack in WalMart. Here’s a internet toast to Jesus’ redemptive power!

  4. Davene Grace

    Except Angie is not exactly married to her hottie…
    Anyway, I’d much rather hang out with you than with her; I’m sure you’re much, much cooler! 🙂
    Avi is so very cute, but when I read this post, I thought–more than anything–about how patiently and graciously you love her. And frankly, I’m amazed. I believe God has given you a special gift and extra strength to be the mother that you are. You’re an inspiration to me!

  5. Lou

    I have a gorgeous book in French called “Le petit ourson” or something. It means the little sea urchin. About a girl with frizzy hair. It’s great! You should see if you can get it in English for Avi. (Who is, of course, absolutely stunningly gorgeous.)
    That knitting woman looks so cool (post below) and I’m a new knitter, so I just downloaded two of her books from kindle! Cool!

  6. Lauren

    She is so beautiful, I hope one day she can accept that and not feel so negative about things. So sad that the actions of her biological mother could effect her even now.

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